I’m weird. And I know I’m weird, so it’s not like I’m trying to hide it. But I try to act as “normal” as possible when I’m at work.
Today, this is very hard.
People can say it all they want: “You’re not autistic. You are fine. OCD is no big deal.”
News flash: I am. I’m not. It is.
Today my challenge is something other people would probably be able to do quite easily. Move on. For me, that task seems impossible. I was just doing research about the cost of new helmet racks and now I don’t know if I need to charge the party responsible for breaking the perfectly good one we had for a brand new one or just for repairs. And I can’t get my answer until my meeting with my boss at 2pm.
So what am I doing now, you ask?
I’m sitting at my desk, looking at the computer screen, unable to move on to the next task which is so neatly written out on my special notebook. I can’t get over the helmet rack. Thanks to my OCD, my mind is set and it cannot be changed. Could I be working on updating a database that I need done by Friday? Yes. Am I going to do that now? No, because I told myself I was going to do that after lunch. Which isn’t for another hour and a half.
Generally, I’m really good at my job. I get assignments and I do them quickly. I don’t like things lingering on my notebook too long so I move efficiently from task to task. I manage my OCD pretty well these days, pushing through my thoughts and but I’m good for one day a week where I’m a lost cause.
Today is that day.